Genome Transcendence: The System (Skills)

How the skill system works.

This is an interesting one. I think fixed skills are stupid. There are an unlimited number of skills you could have in this world, and fixating them is too limiting and discourages good roleplaying. If I wanted to create fixed skills that encompassed our lives, it would be an encyclopedia in itself.

So, GT uses a flexible skill system. Basically, you are given "skill slots". You use these skill slots to put into any skill you can think of in the real world that you want. Below are some sample skills you might want your characters to have.

• Swimming
• Running
• Lock Picking
• Brawling
• AK47
• Anime Knowledge
• Spanish
• Sewing
• Heart Surgery
• PHP Programming
• Speed Reading
• Karate
• Chemistry
• Social Media
• Rock Climbing

As you can see, the sky is the limit. Anything you think might be useful, you can pretty much have. More importantly, it's important for your skills to match your character's background and personality.

Like in real life, you can attempt to do anything you don't have a skill in; it just means that your chance of success would be much lower than if you had the skill.

Some skills can be categorized into one large category. For example, "Military Training". This could include running, swimming, sneaking, basic weapons knowledge, and basic brawling. Any category of skills you decide to take would make you just a novice in it. If you wanted to be really good in a specific skill, you'd have to use one slot for it. So you could have "Military Training" and "Running" both as a skill, which would mean you're particularly good at running, even though it's also part of your military training.

You can also "specialize" in skills. This means that you spend 2 skill slots in the same skill, making you one of the best people alive who has that skill.

If you think about it, we really don't have that many skills we're really good at in real life. Most things we dabble in and don't ever really get deep into. Since a character in GT usually is an expert of some sort, you have more skills than an average person. Don't get overly ambitious with your skills though! Keep in character!

Task difficulty and bonuses.

The difficulty of a task is determined by the GM, usually rated from a 1 to 10 -- 1 being it's extremely easy, and 10 being that it's near impossible. If you don't have a specific skill to perform the task, the difficulty will be higher than if you did. Your success is also modified by your basic stat pertaining to that task. In some cases, the stat is the only thing you need to perform the task.

The degree of your success or failure also differs each time you perform a task. There are always random factors such as how well you concentrate that particular time or how strong the wind is when you're trying to climb up a ladder. This is represented by the number of successes you roll.

Let's take a look at an example.

Sergeant Gregory Levine wants to shoot an enemy 100 meters in front of him with his trusty Glock 19. The difficulty for this is usually a 5. If Gregory doesn't know how to use a Glock 19, the difficulty would go up to a 7. If Gregory doesn't know how to use any handguns at all, the difficulty would go up to a 9. Gregory, however, has a specialization in the Glock 19, making the difficulty drop to a 3.

The usage of a Glock 19 requires good DEX. Gregory has a 65 DEX, so he rolls 6D10 (the stat / 10 rounded down). Each D10 result that's above the difficulty is a success and each below is a failure. The "remaining" 5 points of DEX he has are called "adjusters" can be "burned" to raise one of rolls. Once you burn a point of stat for this purpose, it's gone for the entire session.

Each failed roll, with the exception of a natural roll of 1, are ignored. A natural roll of one is a critical fail and cancels out a successful roll, starting with the highest roll. Adjusters cannot be used to save critical fails, or "botches". Count the total number of successful rolls to determine the overall success of your task.

The more successes you have, the better the outcome.

Gregory rolls 6D10 with the result of 8, 2, 3, 5, 1, and 9. The 1 cancels out the 9 and Gregory ends up with 3 successes. For some reason, Gregory really wants to kill this guy and decides to burn an adjuster point to modify his roll of 2 to 3. His DEX goes down to 64 for the remainder of the session, and he gets 4 successes on his task.

The guy is shot in the head and dies instantly.

If you have more failures than successes, then you fail your task.

Prolonged tasks such as running 5 miles require multiple rolls, usually one roll for each mile or each minute or whatever the GM decides is suitable for the task.

Genome Transcendence: The System (Stats)

GT is based in the near future, around 2030 to 2040, depending on the specific campaign. The world is simply an imaginative version of what our future may be like, so has all the history that we know in real life. Anything that exists today could still be around in GT, such as corporations, people, and technology.

20 years ago, we never thought that everyone would have their own hand phones. Now we all have smartphones. In that sense, any amount of events could have occurred between now and the time of GT.

A little background.

Originally, I had created this game during my college days as an assignment with the goal of "stimulating creative thinking in people", so the mechanism and overall system is not very complicated. It relies heavily on the GM and players' imagination, as well as try to keep a sense of reality intact as much as possible.

While many paper & pen RPGs utilize fixed skills for characters to perform certain tasks, I think that's both restrictive and unrealistic. Anyone should be able to try tasks without specifically having that skill, although success is a complete different story.

I also believe that many of the traditional skills that allow for detection of oddities in others' emotions and actions are a hindrance to real roleplaying. If two players were conversing with each other in character, then the detection should be done in the conversation itself, and not through dice rolls.

Stats

As with most games, GT has stats -- physical and mental traits of your characters that show the pure natural aptitude they have for certain things.

PHYSICAL

Strength (STR)
How strong you are. Bending an iron bar would require STR. Note that this will determine your muscle mass, which means if you want to look small, you can't have a high STR and vice versa.

Dexterity (DEX)
How skillful you are in performing tasks that involve coordination, especially with your hands. Tasks like putting a thread through a needle requires dexterity.

Agility (AGI)
How graceful and nimble you move. How quick on your feet your are. Dodging behind a tree from an oncoming motorcycle would require AGI.

Stamina (STA)
The ability to sustain prolonged physical and mental effort. Note that mental stamina is also part of this stat. Running and studying for long periods of time both require STA.

Fortitude (FOR)
How much physical and mental pain and damage you can take. Enduring getting kicked in the gut and verbal abuse requires FOR.

Comeliness (COM)
How physically attractive you are. Useful for obvious reasons.


MENTAL

Intelligence (INT)
How well you acquire and apply knowledge and skills. Memory is also part of INT. How fast you can learn a language and how well you learn about a foreign culture requires INT.

Wisdom (WIS)
How much experience, knowledge, and good judgment you have. As opposed to INT being a stat for learning and understanding, WIS is the information you already have and how you utilize it. Deciding what to say to a foreigner to persuade him based on what you know of their culture requires WIS.

Perception (PER)
How alert, aware, and how well you notice things. PER is also a measure of your senses (sight, hearing, smell, taste, and touch). Seeing something move behind a tree out of the corner of your eye requires PER.

Charisma (CHA)
How attractive, charming, and inspiring you are. While a high COM does not have to accompany CHA, it usually works even better as a set. Persuading someone to take your suggestion requires CHA.

Willpower (WIL)
How determined and focused you are. Being able to finish 100 push-ups even though you want to give up requires WIL.

Psyche (PSY)
How much psychic energy you have. This is mostly mysterious but has to deal with certain mystical aspects of this world. It also determines how much cybernetic enhancement you can receive without losing your humanity.

Genome Transcendence: Introduction (A fictional story by me.)

Brief Background

In 2018, North Korea invaded South Korea in full force, eventually succeeding in capturing and occupying the country in a bloody 38 month war, giving birth to a new nation -- the United Republic of Choson (URC). While the US attempted to intervene, the political pressure and military presence of China kept them away. With the EU nearly bankrupt, and the UK unwilling to get involved, the URC set its sights on Japan next.

In February of 2022, the Japanese government announced a breakthrough in biochemistry technology by the Tokyo based pharmaceutical giant Biochem Technologies that could change everything the human race knows about human genetics. Announcing that it would be willing to give the technology to China in return for protection from the URC, the Japanese government sent a group of envoys on March 11 to Beijing consisted of 3 government officials and 2 representatives from Biochem Technologies for negotiations with the Chinese government.

The negotiations lasted 4 days, but eventually ended in mutual agreement. On the way to the airport to return to Japan, the diplomatic group from Japan was ambushed by a militant group from the URC. 3 of the 5 were gunned down within minutes while the remaining 2 were able to flee on foot to a nearby subway station. Desperate with nowhere to run or hide, Yuji Hayashida, senior technological adviser of Biochem Technologies, opened the briefcase he was carrying, reached inside to retrieve a glass vial containing a silvery liquid with a slight blue glow. Saburo Morikawa, the other survivor and assistant to the Japan head of state, glanced over at horror.

"What do you think you're doing, Hayashida?!" Saburo shouted.

"It's our only way to survive, Morikawa san," Yuji replied without looking at Saburo. He was busy syphoning the liquid in the vial into a syringe.

"It's not stable yet!"

Even as Saburo objected, Yuji rolled up his sleeves and plunged the syringe into his forearm.

Moments later, the team of militants charged into the subway station in which the two survivors were taking cover. Neither men were ever found. The only things left at the site were an empty briefcase, a couple of empty vials and syringes, and traces of blood.

Two weeks later, the Chinese government announced their complete support of Japan, stating that any attempts to invade Japan would be dealt with using lethal force. All apparent attempts to invade Japan by the URC immediately ceased, and for the first time in years, the world seemed to be at peace.

Fearful that China had finally gotten the edge they needed to oust the US and become the ultimate superpower, the CIA began to send spies to Japan for espionage purposes in order to gain the same lead. The UK, along with France and Germany, formed the Alliance of Security for Europe (ASE), combining resources and stating that they will retaliate any potential threat or invasion of Europe with nuclear strikes.

And hence, the 2nd Cold War began.

Notable Organizations

Corporations

• Biochem Technologies: The world's largest medical and pharmaceutical organization based in Tokyo and founded by the tycoon Masamune Kagura. Often referred to as "Biochem" or "Biochem Tech" for short. Biochem Technologies has been responsible for modern day medical advancements such as tissue regeneration, reproductive stem cells, cure for cancer, complete skin/muscle/bone grafting, and antibody stimulants among others.
• Infinite Sky Incorporated: The world's second largest manufacturer of medical equipment after GE Healthcare. Based in Soweto, South Africa, Infinite Sky Inc. is responsible for such inventions as the Particle Wave Imaging (PWI) machine and Hyper Quantum Spectrometer.
• Hastings & Schmidt: Based in Halifax, Nova Scotia and founded by retired American army general Jeremiah Hastings and German entrepreneur Jonas Schmidt, H&S is the world's largest designer and manufacturer of industrial and military vehicles.
• Smith & Wesson: Headquartered in Springfield, Massachusetts, Smith & Wesson has evolved into the largest manufacturer and supplier of firearms to police forces all over the world.
• Lockheed Martin: American global aerospace, defense, security, and advanced technology company with worldwide interests. It was formed by the merger of Lockheed Corporation with Martin Marietta in March 1995. It is headquartered in Bethesda, Maryland, in the Washington Metropolitan Area. Lockheed Martin employs 123,000 people worldwide. Josephine Hewson is the current president and Chief Executive Officer. Lockheed Martin is one of the world's largest defense contractors; in 2009, an estimated 74% of Lockheed Martin's revenues came from military sales.

Military

• Army of the United Republic of Choson (AURC): The general term for the military forces of the URC. Several branches, including elite forces, exist in AURC, but are the details are mostly unknown.
• Organization of the Alliance of Security for Europe Special Services (OASESS): Consisted of elite men and women from the Scotland Yard, MI6, and the military forces of the UK, France, and Germany, OASESS is one of the most skilled and feared military organization in the world.
• International Reconnaissance & Investigation Specialists (IRIS): A group of highly trained and extremely skilled specialists maintained by the United Nations since NATO was disbanded. While it is known that IRIS is being recruited, trained, and sponsored by several large private corporations for UN missions, much of this organization is unknown.
• US Armed Forces: While still the major military force of the world, the military forces of the US is recently dwindling in power compared to the consolidated forces of other nations.
• People's Liberation Army (PLA): The PLA is the military arm of the Communist Party of China (CPC) and the de facto armed forces of the People's Republic of China, consisting of land, sea, strategic missile and air forces. The PLA is the world's largest military force, with a strength of approximately 2,250,000 personnel (about 0.18% of the country's population). The PLA comprises five main service branches, consisting of the PLA Ground Force, PLA Navy (PLAN), PLA Air Force (PLAAF), Second Artillery Corps (strategic missile force), and the PLA Reserve Force.

Major Recent Happenings

It is the year 2031. Biochem Technologies has achieved world dominance in the field of pharmaceuticals and cosmetics. While rumors exist that Biochem Tech, along with its long time partner Infinite Sky Incorporated, is also the cause of the deformations and strange anomalies plaguing the world for the past decade, no substantial evidence has been found -- not anything that stands up in court, anyway.

Hastings & Schmidt opened up its first factory in the URC, much to the dismay of the US government. While opposition of this did arise in the UN, at the end, there simply wasn't anything to be done about it.

The 2nd Cold War has been going on for nearly 10 years. Some minor skirmishes have broken out over the years, but thus far, the major players have all been holding their breath, waiting to see what everyone else does.

The PLA has placed several military bases across Japan, some of them oddly close to the US military bases already there. Whether this is due to collaboration or antagonistic mockery is unclear.

The URC has established itself as a major player in the world, both economically and militantly. While China has shown support for Japan, it has still retained its friendly relationship with the URC. Of course, what kind of anxieties lie underneath the surface, no one truly knows.

Earlier this year, news of entire villages in rural areas of China disappearing have plagued TV channels and radio stations. It has been reported that villages of up to 2,000 people would simply disappear overnight. No traces whatsoever. The Chinese government denies the accusations that it is using these people for inhumane experiments.

The Fukushima Nuclear Disaster & How It Affects You

As a physicist in a related field of study, I'm a bit more sensitive to news of radiation leak than the average folk. Although not to the point of paranoia, I know very well how radioactive substances can spread and affect the human body, not to mention our ecosystem.

Also, as a long time resident of Japan, the problems with the "Daiichi Fukushima Nuclear Plant" has constantly been a concern to me ever since the earthquake that devastated Japan on March 11, 2011; yet, I find that many to whom I speak with seem to have no clue as to the magnitude and impact of this nuclear disaster that has been declared as the worst in the history of humankind.

An explosion at Daiichi Fukushima Nuclear Plant shortly after the earthquake of 2011.

The 2011 Tōhoku earthquake and tsunami, measuring at over 9 in magnitude, caused several explosions and system failures at the Daiichi Fukushima Power Plant, resulting in the meltdown of nuclear cores and the subsequent release of radioactive isotopes (this is what we usually call "radiation").

Over the last 2.5 years, large quantities of iodine-131, cesium-134, cesium-137, and strontium-90 has emitted from the nuclear plant.

Now, this is where things are important. You will find many news articles and reports that talk about the amount of radioactive substances that were released. Some of them talk about millisieverts, some talk about becquerels, some even talk about it in terms of curie.

How the hell are we supposed to know what the fuck that means?

And if we don't know, then we don't care.

Let's not get into the scientific details of all this, and all you need to know about all these units of measurement is that they are all named after dead people who studied radioactive substances (and, inevitably, died from them).

Radiation isn't as simple as drinking rat poisoning. Radioactive isotopes have different effects, different half-life, and different, well, everything. Also, it takes prolonged exposure over time for radiation to have an effect on living beings. Of course, if you're exposed to an enormous amount of it, it would take no time at all for you to melt into a pool of unidentifiable fucking obliteration (UFO).

A lot of people joke about how you would grow a third arm or glow in the dark if you're exposed to radiation. The truth is most likely much more boring -- you'll probably just get some form of rare cancer and die a slow painful death.

So. How does this affect you? Why the fuck should you care?

Excellent question! Let's take a look at some concerns.

Skiing might kill you.

Many folks in Asia go to Japan for leisurely activities in the snow, skiing and snowboarding being the favorites. This is, of course, understandable, since Japan is one of the few Asian countries that has snow for extended periods of time and has high quality skiing resorts.

Unfortunately, most regions that have enough snow to have a ski resort are relatively close to the nuclear plants in Fukushima.

If the Fukushima plants continue to release radiation as it has been (and all current evidence suggests that it will), in 5 more years, most of the snow at nearby ski resorts will have enough radioactive isotopes in it to kill you within a month should some of it get into your mouth.

Eating might kill you.

The Fukushima nuclear plant has been, and is currently, releasing tons of water freshly contaminated by extremely harmful radioactive isotopes into the nearby sea. The nearby sea happens to be the Pacific Ocean. Some of the measurements have shown the contamination to be beyond 1800 millisieverts -- enough to kill you in 4 hours of exposure.

A few years -- maybe even in a few months -- the little fishies and prawns and crabs that have been happily swimming in this toxic water will make their way to your dining table. Sure, they probably wouldn't have absorbed 1800 millisieverts of radiation. Probably only 10% or so. So you'll get 40 hours instead to bid your loved ones goodbye.

Breathing might kill you.

Ultimately, if the release of radiation isn't somehow stopped, the air we breathe will become lethal. Many seem to think this is not a concern for those who don't live in Japan. Radioactive isotopes are alive and well at the atomic level. They cling on to pretty much anything, including cars, clothing, and air. Well, yeah, air particles have atoms too, you know?

Those in Southeast Asia are currently still lucky, since the winds don't often blow in that direction from Japan (but west coast U.S. is getting fucked up right now), but this isn't a permanent occurrence. Eventually, Southeast Asia will get just as much as any other area in the world, and believe me when I tell you that a couple of plutonium rocks in a superheated nuclear reactor contains enough radiation to wipe out half of the world's population.

And it's gonna take at least 40 years to clean this shit up.

This is the best part. The Japanese government has vowed to clean the whole nuclear mess up in, "hopefully 40 years". If 40 years is hopeful, I think being scared of the situation is pretty justified.

Let me just leave you with one final thought. TEPCO, the electric company that was responsible for the operation of Daiichi Fukushima Nuclear Plant, has paid billions in damages because of this disaster. They are now wiped out, and the government has taken control of the corporation.

What does this mean?

It means that all the damages and costs for containment, repairing, compensation for residents, cleaning up, building preventive measures, hiring suicide cleaning squads, hiring nuclear experts, creating propaganda to calm the citizens, creating propaganda to hold off global media, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. is now all being paid by the Japanese government.

Just this morning, the Japanese government has announced that they will build a wall to prevent more radioactive water from leaking into the ocean. This is estimated to cost 4.8 billion U.S. dollars, and will be paid entirely by the government.

It's only been 2.5 years and we've seen more than 10 billion dollars spent on dealing with this situation. With the horrible decline in economy and Japan already having the world's second largest national deficit, how long do you think that's gonna last?

5 Signs That A Guy Isn't Ready For Marriage

Marriage used to be such an easy issue in our parents' generation. You find someone decent enough to live with, have kids, and the rest, you deal with as it happens.

Now, though, marriage is a huge deal. It's a huge deal in that we longer want to deal with stupid shit and demand assurance of a peachy marriage in advance.

Well, there is no such assurance. Marriage is the ultimate proverbial "leap of faith". If you're cool with dying alone, don't get married; but if you would rather take a bit of shit now and then (or frequently if you're unlucky) than to eat oatmeal and shop for your own headstone alone, these are some of the most fundamental signs for you of a guy who is not ready for marriage (or any kind of relationship at that).

1. He Can't Pay For His Own Meal

It doesn't even matter if you're rich enough to support him. Any decent guy who is mature enough to get married should have a stable job. The fact that he would even consider marriage before getting a stable job shows he's not ready.

Several obvious hints exist for this type of person, such as

• always "forgets" his wallet,
• never asks for the bill himself,
• asks you if you have money before going into a restaurant,
• lives with his parents after the age of 35,
• thinks working hard is for losers.

2. He Thinks Cheating Only Applies To The Wife

I've actually heard this plenty of times: "Men have urges, unlike women. So for men, it's not really cheating, just fulfilling a primal need." Wow. Comparing cheating on your wife with taking a shit. That's just insulting.

These type of guys often

• think that commitments are unnecessary,
• insist that you quit your job and stay at home,
• get incredibly upset when you touch their phones,
• demand that you cut off all relationships with anything classified as male,
• have incredibly mysterious relationships with other women that he refuses to explain.

3. He Only Bathes When The Flies Around Him Start To Annoy Him

Smell is pretty damn important, isn't it? Not to mention just general hygiene. So if a person can't be bothered with cleaning himself, most likely he can't be bothered with doing any other fundamental tasks that are important in life. Ditch him immediately.

Also watch for

• dirty and/or long fingernails,
• dirty/old/torn up shoes,
• dandruff blizzard,
• stained clothing, and
• a cockroach-infested car.

4. He Thinks A Woman Shouldn't Have Her Own Opinions

Not sure what day and age or twilight zone a guy lives in to think this way, but believe me, there are plenty of them out there. Stay away at all cost.

Signs that you might find for this are

• doesn't listen much and instead talks about himself all the time,
• seems to listen to you but never actually does what you say,
• always stops you from giving any strong opinions by kissing you or turning it into sex,
• constantly tells you what to wear, and
• demands sex whenever he wants it and can't take no for an answer.

5. He Thinks Women Don't Fart

Think no guy actually think like this? Think again.

These guys usually

• are virgins,
• want you to be a virgin,
• think that a wife is a maid + prostitute they don't have to pay for,
• want you to look "pretty" 24 hours a day until you die (while they walk around in dirty underwear with dried-up come), and
• think you secretly like to be their bitch.

I'm a guy, yet I specifically wrote this about guys, because I'm so sick of these type of jerks giving the entire genre of males a bad reputation.

It's getting more and more tough to have a decent marriage. In fact, it's getting more and more tough to even have decent relationships without most women nowadays looking at you like you're scum. Unfortunately, the main reason for this is because most guys are scum.

Hopefully, this will not only act as a guide for women of what to avoid, but also as a guide for men of what not to become.

10 Things You Should Do for a Job Interview

I've been getting quite some requests to give advice on the proper etiquettes for job interviews. At first I didn't quite understand, since this type of advice is readily available throughout the web, and most of it should be common sense anyway.

But then I realized, most of the advice you find on the web is actually too "advanced", and that common sense seems to be lacking quite a bit in Malaysia as far as job hunting is concerned (probably more).

For those of you who don't know who the fuck I am, allow me to give you some "credentials". I've been in senior management for more than 12 years. I've founded 3 companies, and I've also been a "career and educational advisor" as a side job for almost 10 years now, mostly with the University of Tokyo.

Okay, enough stupid shit about me. Let's get to my top 10. Before that, though, let's set some criteria.

1. This is mostly meant for fresh graduates, but certainly applies to anyone who is serious about getting a job. Please read that again. "anyone who is serious about getting a job". If you're just out to randomly get interviews and hope one of them gives you a job, you can do whatever you want, and this list is not for you.
2. This list is based on my experience in the past and certainly doesn't represent nearly everything you need to know about job interviews.
3. Some of you will find this list to be so basic, you'll be shocked that anyone could need it. Trust me, I was shocked too.
4. This list is based on the objective of succeeding in the interview and getting the position. Whether you actually want or like that position is up to your discretion. If you don't like the job, you shouldn't be going to the interview in the first place, but I understand there are other factors too. Like money. And money.
5. This list is not for any specific industry, but assumes interviews for professional positions within an office. If you were going to a beach to apply for a lifeguard position, not all of the list may apply to you.
6. If this list is too difficult or too much trouble for you to follow, I suggest you speak to your parents about being a bum for life.

So, here we go. My list of 10 things you should try your best to do for an interview.

1. Dress Appropriately

I've actually had people walk into my office in a t-shirt, shorts, and sandals for a job interview. If the company you're applying to is at all decent, they tell you to go home on the spot.

A long sleeve button shirt and slacks work for both men and women, and are always a safe bet. Women have more choices, but if you decide to wear a skirt, make sure that it's long enough to cover up to just above your knees at the shortest and that it's not flimsy -- the skirt from a suit works best. Baju kurung, kebaya, and other traditional wear are of course also acceptable (in fact, I look forward to seeing kebaya, but that's just a personal preference). Also remember to make sure your clothing is not too colorful or bright -- black, white, brown, grey, blue are all good choices.

Shoes make a huge impression on people. Make sure you're wearing proper leather shoes with socks. For women, a proper heel -- 3 to 5 cm -- is usually good for making a good impression. If you wear a skirt, it is highly advisable that you also wear stockings.

2. Be On Time

I can never stress enough how important punctuality is, and I can also never understand why so many people are not. Take a moment to think about it. Why would the busy boss of a company (the better the company, the more busy the boss) hire someone who wastes his/her time? By being late, you're essentially wasting people's time, and that helps no one.

Don't use traffic jams as an excuse. If you can't even predict a traffic jam and leave early to compensate for it, I sure as hell am not going to trust you with any serious job task. Even if you are late due to some completely unavoidable situation -- which is extremely rare --

3. Don't Make Excuses

If you think you're going to be late, call the company (speak directly to the interviewer if possible), and apologize. They don't need your excuses. The fact that you're going to be late is the only important point. Whether you got into an accident or had diarrhea (yes, someone used that on me), they don't need or want to know about it. The more you try to emphasize your excuse, the less trustworthy of a person you portray yourself to be.

Something to the effect of, "I'm so sorry, Sir/Madam. I don't think I can make it on time. Could we please delay the interview by 30 minutes?" is good. Don't forget to apologize! "Hello? I will be late. Jam." does not cut it. It'll get you cut though.

If you need to cancel the interview, call and apologize as well. Don't think that just because you got another seemingly better offer that you don't need to maintain good relationships with others. You never know when it'll come back and bite you in the ass in the future. It's a small world.

4. Stand The Fuck Up

Many times, you'll be asked to sit in a room and wait for the interviewer to join. When the interviewer comes, stand your ass up! Don't sit there like a sack of soggy potatoes and shake their hands like you're the boss; and don't sit until they sit, or until you're offered to sit.

5. Look Them In The Eyes

Yes, this is important. Someone who avoids looking at others in the eyes in a conversation or when being questioned shows lack of confidence, lack of respect, and lack of manners. Don't stare, though. There's a difference.

6. Don't Lie

The fact that I have to list this is sad, but I've found this to be a major issue. Don't lie about your work history or education or knowledge. You're not gonna get away with it, and it's going to cost you your job. You'd be lucky if you don't get hired, because getting fired for giving false information during the interview is not only embarrassing, but detrimental for your resume.

7. Don't Open Your Laptop

You shouldn't even be bringing one. I've had several experiences in which the candidate comes in for an interview, flops open his/her laptop, plugs it in without asking, and types away like I'm the one being interviewed. You shouldn't even be writing anything. You should only take out your pen and notebook and take notes when it is your turn to ask the interviewer about the company and the position you're applying for. Until then, sit still, answer the questions, and don't fidget!

8. Turn Your Phone Off

How hard can this be? At least make sure it's been put on silence mode. And for the love of professionalism, DON'T ANSWER YOUR PHONE during the interview! In fact, don't touch it at all! Even while waiting or the interviewer isn't there. Just sit! Chill! Don't start Candy Crushing. If I'm the interviewer, I'd send you packing immediately.

9. Ask Proper Questions

Ask about your job requirements. Ask about the company's background and what it does. Ask about the other employees. Don't ask about benefits or pay! You can negotiate on salary when you receive the offer, if you receive it at all. If you're asked about your expected salary, do answer (I advise against playing negotiation games. Just tell them the amount you think you're worth). If after you receive your job offer, and you feel the job description doesn't match the compensation (too much work for too little pay), then you can negotiate.

Just remember, it's not official until you accept, so no need to get into the details during the interview. Your objective in a job interview is to leave a good impression and get hired. Negotiate after you've been offered.

10. Smile

Not like a dork, but pleasantly. As much as possible. Trust me. It's important.

So there you have it. My recommended top 10 things you should do for a job interview. There are lots and lots more things I could give suggestions on, but that'll be for another day.

Just remember, respect the person who is going to decide whether you're getting a job or not. Don't think of job hopping as an option. Think of it as a last resort. Happy job hunting!

Oh. Follow me on Twitter if you'd like. @TheExBoss

Cheers!

Traffic Accident & My Broken BM

Recently, I got into a traffic accident. This is a record of the accident and its aftermath, mostly for my benefit, but hopefully to also act as a reference for the folks out there who are concerned or have questions about what to do or what happens when getting into a traffic accident in Malaysia; especially for the expats who don't speak BM and don't know what the fuck is going on with this country in general.

After attending an ex-colleague/friend's full moon party earlier this month, I was on my way home via DUKE highway. Unfortunately, I got on in the wrong direction, so I had to go through the toll gate, get off immediately, and u-turn back on the highway to face the right direction.

As I frustratingly got through the SmartTag gate, I turned on my left turn signal, and crossed from the right all the way to the left towards the exit across roughly 5 lanes worth of road (I say "roughly" because there are no lines on the road immediately before and after the toll gates, which is something I really think should be fixed). Once I got to the most left lane, I slowed down to be sure I wasn't running into any oncoming traffic that had just entered the highway from behind and trying to merge into the mainstream traffic.

And wouldn't you know it, a motorcycle came crashing into the left back side of my car. I was watching the whole thing, so I saw the guy with his head down -- probably texting on his phone -- come crashing into my car from behind, bounce, and hop off as his motorcycle went skidding towards the wall. Luckily for both of us, this happened during low traffic on a Sunday night, and at the very left side where there was almost no traffic at all.

I immediately stopped my car at the side of the road, got out, and ran over to the rider. I asked him if he was all right, whether he was hurt badly, and if he wanted me to call an ambulance or the police. He hopped around a bit on one leg, showcasing that the crash had hurt one of his legs, then proceeded to do something on his phone, ignoring my questions and concern. He then sat down on the side of the road, so I sat down next to him and repeated my previous questions. This time, he told me that he was fine, and that he was going to call his friend to come pick him up since his motorcycle was wrecked and wouldn't start.

While I felt pity for the guy, I also couldn't help but think to myself that he really needs to be more careful about how he rides, since it could've easily been much worse. I then asked him if it was okay for me to leave. He nodded and said, "Ya". So I left.

A week later, I received a letter from the police summoning me to the police station. Apparently, the motorcycle rider had made a police report of the accident, probably because he wanted to claim insurance. Knowing that the police in Malaysia often do not speak -- or refuse to speak -- English, I contacted my Malay buddy and asked for him to accompany me to the police station, which he graciously agreed to.

So we headed down to the police station in KL near China Town to make the report. As expected, my friend was of great help, getting me through the whole process much much faster than I could ever hope to on my own. To my dismay, though, we were told that the sergeant in charge of my case was not on duty and that I had to come again in a couple of days. Luckily, though, we were also informed that this particular sergeant speaks English, so we got my paperwork finished and headed home.

The next morning, I received a phone call from the sergeant in charge of my case to confirm that I was going to visit him. I confirmed and headed out there again the next day as agreed.

I headed into the sergeant's office and was told to wait outside. A few minutes later, the sergeant came outside to call me in. At this point, I was already surprised at the very professional way the sergeant was handling his visitor. Anyway, I get in, sit down at the sergeant's desk, pass him the paperwork, and as expected, the sergeant starts to speak to me in BM.

"Sorry. I don't speak Bahasa."

"But you're Malaysian! Why you don't speak Bahasa!"

Dude. I get your point, but you really don't need to shout it for the whole room to hear.

"I spent most of my life overseas -- about 30 years (I said tiga puluh tahun in an attempt to please him) in Japan."

"Kerja di Jepun?" Oh, this one I understand.

"Yes. I studied and worked there."

"Good money lah."

"Uhhh, not so bad."

The sergeant snickers and proceeds to process my paperwork.

"Okaaay. You explain to me the accident."

Before I could open my mouth, the sergeant continued.

"In Bahasa."

My pupils dilated like a scared puppy's.

"You try lah! If I don't understand then you explain in English also can."

While thinking about the horror of unleashing my tremendously limited and broken BM, I nodded reluctantly and spoke.

"Saya pandu di DUKE. Saya keluar dari SmartTag kemudian pergi kiri."

The sergeant chuckled and nodded for me to continue.

"Moto itu masuk highway dari kiri. Saya lihat moto itu, tapi dia memandu sangat laju!"

This got the sergeant to laugh a bit out loud, but he motioned to me with a thumbs up to show that he understood me. So I continued.

"Then crash."

The sergeant smiled, told me that the story was pretty much the same as what the rider of the motorcycle had told him, and even showed me the drawing the rider had drawn of the accident, which was pretty accurate.

Then the next part truly came as a surprise.

The sergeant told me that it was obvious from our recount of the accident that there was no fault on my part, and that the motorcycle should have yielded to me before trying to merge. He told me to go get photos taken of the damage on my car and to go home and wait for the official report.

Until that point, I had been told by friends and relatives and tweeters that in Malaysia, if a car gets into an accident with a motorcycle, 99.9% the car will be declared at fault. Well, either my case was a miracle, or common sense does still prevail, even in a country as seemingly fucked up as this one.

So, to everyone out there who still believes that you can't win in an accident with a motorcycle, you just never know until you actually try. If you truly did nothing wrong, the possibility of it turning out in your favor is still there; and if it doesn't, well, just be grateful if no one died or got hurt seriously. Also, please please please don't go charging at the other party in anger after an accident. Be courteous and kind. No one wants to be in an accident intentionally (except the scammers, of course), and please always remember that making sure no one is hurt badly should always be the top priority.

And to the sergeant who was in charge of my case who will probably never read this, thank you for your professional manner with which you dealt with the case, and thank you for giving me the opportunity to show off what a bad ass I am at speaking BM.